Saturday, February 27, 2010

New job, new city, new house, new life?

Dear friends,
Sorry so long since the last post. Unfortunately, the spinal cord stimulator trial failed, and failed miserably. The pain specialist removed my electrodes after less than 24 hrs versus the scheduled 6 days. Apparently, because of all the hardware in my neck from my surgeries impeded any electrical stimulation from reaching my neck. They tried everything they could think of and I never felt anything above my shoulders. Apparently, a normal "impedence level" is between 100-300 and my level was upwards of 1500. Apparently, that is a bad sign that it wont ever work, at least implanting the electrodes in that fashion.
The other big news is that Harrison has accepted a job in knoxville. He is very excited about this new opportunity and after alot of prayer, we decided that the move would be a good thing for us, especially after my failed trial. He starts mid march as a project manager for Architectural Graphic International (AGI). AGI is a national sign company with clients such as Ford, Mercedes, Jiffy Lube, just to name a few. He is happy to finally be on a salary based job with normal hours and specific job tasks.
After lots and lots of looking via internet and in person, we found a house that we put an offer on and the sellers accepted. I never thought we would buy a house. We originally planned on renting, but God opened doors (literally and figuratively speaking) and it has been a smooth process thus far. We have the inspection next week. Harrison can either start his job on the 8th or the 15th depending on what he wants to do. We close on the house on March 26 so i have no idea how the next few weeks will play out for me and where I will be. Moving from Nashville was a bittersweet decision for me. I'm sad to leave friends and sad to leave my first real job, especially since it was a job i had always planned on going back to. Now, if I ever get well enough to go back to work, it will be at a different place, with different people. Its kinda stupid but I'd always sorta envisioned my first day back at vanderbilt after my long leave of absence. I envisioned everyone being happy to see me, me being happy to be back, and holding and caring for my first baby since my last day almost a year ago. I envisioned it being such a happy day for me. A victory over the pain I've been dealing with. But that day will never happen. I guess its more that i wanted to prove to myself that I could overcome whats been keeping me so down, and maybe i will someday, but it wont be at vanderbilt. I've made some of my best friends in my life at this job and in Nashville. Leaving these people will be more challenging than leaving the job that still is waiting for me. But again, I think now more than ever, i need my family to be near. We are going to put 110% into figuring out whats wrong with me. and maybe, just maybe, my life can go back to some type of order. I can find a focus or a goal again to focus on.
Please continue to pray for Harrison and I as we transition over the next few weeks. Pray for me as I leave my former dreams behind and pray I can find new dreams in Knoxville. As always, I appreciate all the love, concern, and prayers. Thanks for reading.

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